IT Confidential: The Computer Industry Is A ClichéIT Confidential: The Computer Industry Is A Cliché

The first rule of good writing is to avoid clichés--like the plague, I'd be tempted to say, except that would violate the rule. It's lazy writing to fall back on trite phrases or familiar truisms, which I'd point out is probably more honored in the breach than in the observance, except ... well, you know.

There's a funny thing about clichés, though, and that has to do with how often they're right. That's especially true in the computer industry, which, despite its self-styled newness and radicalism is actually one corny, rags-to-riches, dog-eat-dog, mousetrap-making, hardball-playing, Kool-Aid-drinking cliché.

And sometimes clichés are just more fun. Here are a few that occurred to me while surveying the current technology landscape.

>> You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink. According to an article in the Cleveland Plain Dealer last week, building inspectors in Cleveland refuse to use the PDAs the city has provided for them, to the tune of about $60,000, because (a) they're too difficult to operate; (b) they're not really faster than filling out paper forms; or (c) they can be used to track the inspectors' workload, productivity, and whereabouts. Alternate cliché: You can't fit a square peg in a round hole.

>> Every cloud has a silver lining. When Microsoft chairman Bill Gates visited Romania last week, to celebrate the opening of a new Microsoft technical center in the capital city of Bucharest, Romanian President Traian Basescu reportedly told him that pirated Microsoft software had helped build the country's dynamic technology industry. "Gates made no comment," according to a Reuters story. You bet, because software leaders are loath to admit the role that widely reproduced, albeit illegal, copies of their products have played in establishing them as standards. Think Lotus 1-2-3 in the 1980s. Globalization is another round of that self-perpetuating process. Alternate cliché: It's like closing the barn door after the horse is gone.

>> There's more than one way to skin a cat. On a conference call with analysts last week to discuss Google's spectacular financial results, CEO Eric Schmidt pointed out that the search leader is looking for growth in a variety of formats beyond its online pay-per-click ad business, including newspapers, video (based on its $1.65 billion acquisition of YouTube), and radio (based on its acquisition of dMarc Broadcasting). "Probably the biggest one is going to be radio," Schmidt said. Alternate cliché: Everything old is new again.

>> A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. Kevin Rollins was dumped unceremoniously at Dell, and Michael Dell is back running the company that bears his name. The board has faith in Michael Dell, but most analysts say there are no quick fixes for the PC maker. Alternate cliche: Don't cut off your nose to spite your face.

>> What goes around, comes around. Apple and Cisco Systems said last week that Cisco has agreed to put its trademark lawsuit on hold to give Apple more time to respond to Cisco's accusation that Apple appropriated the name iPhone for its new cell phone, and for the two to try and work out a deal. Alternate cliché: Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer.

>> The more things change, the more they remain the same. A blog post surfaced last week with the rumor that Oracle was preparing to make an offer to acquire applications archrival SAP. Alternate cliché: That'll happen when hell freezes over.

Pony up a cliche, and while you're at it, tack on an industry tip, and send them to jsoat@ cmp.com, or call 516-562-5326.

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